I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
