Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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