why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Randomize
