Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
