She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
