Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
