i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Randomize