Sry I called you an 8
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
