I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
