Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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