real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
the room spins SO much faster in panama
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
