isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
and she was petting her beer can
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Randomize
