OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
