God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
