You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
