Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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