is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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