i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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