Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
