If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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