HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Randomize
