Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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