In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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