I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
