guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Randomize
