They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
