i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Randomize
