Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize