doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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