every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
