there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize