You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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