Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
