Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
