i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
