I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
