she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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