the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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