At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
She announced her abortion via fbk
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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