Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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