Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
