Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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