Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
