Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
