May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
