Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
