I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
