Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
