is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
