Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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